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Lost & Found: Dog Disco Isn’t Dead, Surprisingly

The above video is 30 seconds of pure weird that’s just subtle enough to worm its way into your brain and stay there, dancing along to the faint sounds of a song you vaguely recognize but can never quite pin down.

While you watch this video for the third, fourth and fifth time, realize that it’s entirely possible that these dogs had more fun than you or we ever will. Or maybe this is dog hell, the final destination of those dogs who always s— on the carpet and fart in your face just as you’re getting to sleep.

This is an open-ended work. Instead of creating a narrative and resolving it like most modern stories, this video conjures up many disturbing possibilities. Like any masterpiece, this short film featuring dogs dressed up in the latest fashion of the time forces you to question your place in the world and perhaps reality as you understand it.

The most frustrating part is the end, when the human host, who lacks any sense of rhythm or personality, promises to return with more Dog Disco. But then the video ends. Extensive research has turned up no trace of additional Dog Disco, despite the host’s promise. What sort of hellish fiend would unleash this into the world? Is it a more modern version of the mythical play ‘The King in Yellow’? Is this dance studio full of frolicking hell hounds the land of Carcosa in a different form?

It would seem that this idea has seeped into the cultural zeitgeist. In the past few years, doggy discos have been popping up here and there, like the one in New York, reported on by the New York Post. Then there’s this report from the Yorkshire Evening Post on a canine night spot in the English city of Leeds.

The last thing we want to do is spread fear and sow mistrust of man’s best friend. But we think it prudent to keep a sharp eye on any dancing dogs or people who encourage this sort of behavior among any of our beloved pets. What’s next, cat cardio? Ferret fandangos? Goldfish galas? We think we’ve made our point.

Next: Lost & Found: The Origin of Gratuitous Skin In Music Videos

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