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Fiona Apple Told to ‘Shut Up and Sing’ by Texas Sheriff’s Department

Fiona Apple
Frederick M. Brown, Getty Images

Following Fiona Apple‘s recent onstage rant about her drug bust last week in Sierra Blanca, Texas, a spokesman for the Hudspeth County Sheriff’s Dept. has issued a statement of his own — suggesting that Apple stop talking about the ordeal and instead “just shut-up and sing.”

Apple spent a night in jail following her arrest last Wednesday for possession of marijuana and hash, and she spoke about the incident at length during a rambling — and somewhat confusing — onstage diatribe when her tour resumed Friday in Houston. At one point, she threatened to reveal the misdeeds of the four officers she claimed had mistreated her while she was locked up — and make them “f—ing famous” in the process.

Hudspeth County Sheriff’s Dept. Public Information Officer Rusty Fleming has since fired back at the singer in an open letter that surfaced on TMZ. We’d pick out some highlights, but trust us, it’s best if you just read the whole thing. Here you go:

First, Honey, I’m already more famous than you, I don’t need your help. However, it would appear that you need mine….

Two weeks ago nobody in the country cared about what you had to say, — now that you’ve been arrested it appears your entire career has been jump-started. Don’t worry Sweetie, I won’t bill you…

Next, have you ever heard of Snoop, Willie or Armand Hammer? Maybe if you would read something besides your own press releases, you would have known BEFORE you got here, that if you come to Texas with dope, the cops will take your DOPE away and put YOU in jail… [Snoop Dogg, Willie Nelson, and actor Armie Hammer were all arrested for marijuana possession in Sierra Blanca, the same Texas town that Fiona was -- Ed.]

Even though you and I only met briefly in the hallway, I don’t know you but I’m sure you’re an awesome and talented young woman and even though I’m not a fan of yours, I am sure there are thousands of them out there, and I’m sure that they would just as soon you get this all behind you and let you go back to what you do best-so my last piece of advice is simple “just shut-up and sing.”

Sincerely

Rusty Fleming

 

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